Loryn Brown... You Will Always Be Loved!

Well here we are, two days after the huge tornado tore across the South.  With fatality numbers rising and new "road blocks" every day, I would have expected many people to say the famous, "Oh my gosh, that's awful" and go back to their lives. But you know what? That is exactly the opposite of what is occuring across our state.

There has been more people pull together in the last two days than I have ever seen in my lifetime. People who have never met, previous enemies, and people we will never know have given their time, money, supplies, blood, prayers, and assistance to people they will never know. The only way to explain such selflessness is to acknowledge that God is definitely walking with each and every one of us right now, even if you do not want to hold his hand. I personally have clung to Him over the past few days more than I ever have, and I specifically was not even devastated by this disaster. But, I need him, and fortunately, He's here with me!

When I heard of a specific fatality of a girl who graduated from Edgewood Academy, Loryn Brown, I automatically did what many of you have done or will do if you did not know her: I looked her up on facebook.  From what I can tell, she was the All American Beauty Pageant Winning Surrounded by Friends Great Personality College Student. She was smiling in almost every single picture, and her curly hair was wild and free... something I find beautful in itself.

The last picture of Loryn with the houndstooth shoulder strap is my absolute favorite... There's something about the look on her face and the sparkle in her eye (and her awesome bright white teeth that we all would envy!) that seems to say, "I am so completely happy at this very moment!"

It appears that her mother came to Tuscaloosa not too long ago and they went on a little family photo shoot for a day. I found myself thanking God that they took the time to do that, as many of us rarely do.  Those pictures will be cherished by many forever, and they will always have them! Loryn looked identical to her mother, which is where she got her beautiful curls and bright smile. When you look like your  mother and you are close to your mother as it seems like she was, there is a special bond... maybe from always hearing, "She's a spitting image of you!" I read in one of her picture comments where someone wrote, "Loryn, you look beautiful." and Loryn's response was this:"Thanks! You know I get it from my mom!" Breaks my heart... You know that could have just as easily have been you or me, and for many, it almost was!

Below is the link to the news clip of Loryn's parent's that aired last night.

http://www.wsfa.com/Global/story.asp?S=14545445

I've found myself hoping that she didn't know quite how bad it was, and praying that she didn't suffer.  I know how scared I was in my closet and I didn't have a tornado outside my house. What I felt when I looked at her picture was sadness mixed with fear, because of this: When she smiled so big for the camera, she had no idea that her life would be taken so early. She thought she had forever, just like we think we do. One of her picture captions even says, "You can't replace this!" And you know what? She was exactly right.  Having done thousands of autopsies, I've often caught myself wondering what each person would do different if they knew their time to be called to heaven would be soon.. Would they change anything? Would she have changed anything? Would we change anything? What would it be?

We are all fortunate to have the opportunity to change things in our lives from this point on, because our fragile lives were spared! We are still alive, and we have to rethink how we all live. The story of our lives is determines by the compilation of each an every day we live and our actions.  I have the urge to contact old friends and family members that I often think of but do not take the time to let them know... how long would it take? A few extra minutes? I received a message a few years ago from a fellow classmate, Justin Rye. All it said was, "Hey girl. I just wanted to see how you have been doing lately." I checked the message and realized I was late for class and I decided I would write back a little later... two days later, he passed away. I never wrote him back. We were not close friends, but we WERE friends and that's what matters now... And I will always wish I had let him know that instead of deciding to write back later.  Tuscaloosa RIGHT NOW should show us all that we may not have later!

My husband is heading home for a temporary stay as I type, and I am so thankful that God kept him safe while he dealt with the fatalities there. From my own experience working with death and autopsies and mass fatalities, when you come home from an area of devastation surrounded by death constantly for an extended amount of time, the transformation to ordinary life is so stressful. It is like temporary Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and you don't even realize it until it hits you hard! I worked a mass murder a while back, and it took me days to relax and ease back to being normal, because you play everything over and over all the time, and then someone asks you what you want for dinner. Dinner? Why would you be talking about dinner when these people are suffering? That's what you think, but unless you have been there, you would not understand.


While I have worked situations very similar, I have not been with him during this experience, therefore I do not understand fully now. Please pray that God gives me the ability to comfort him when he comes home. We work so well together because we both have such a strong ability to block out and deal with death and trauma, but we do this together. For those who do not know, our relationship started because we work together.  So from the beginning, we have been a partner to each other, and we have leaned on each other through each difficult day. I've done autopsies on children hundreds of times, and he was right there holding my up in his own little way, letting me know that he truly knows what emotions I had to learn to deal with.  In fact, he taught me how to deal with death... He taught me different coping mechanisms and how to be successful. He physically trained me in a lot of areas at my job (before we started dating), and his mentality was, "I'm going to make you better than I ever was." Where I am weak, he is strong and visa versa. He is the strongest man I know when dealing with this kind of situation, but a situation like this can bring you to your knees really quickly.... and this time it's up to me to catch him when he falls. This is the first time we have been apart on scenes, so this is a new area for me. We are a team, but  have to learn how to play my position this time from the sidelines.

Now multiply that by thousands. That's how many people are dealing with these emotions. Think about how many parents are picking up their college children who rode out the tornado, and the are devastated and traumatized. What do you say to your child in a time like this? While you are thankful they survived, you cannot understand what emotions they are experiencing.  Pray harder for those people, because they are not acclamated with death as we are. This is our life because of our career in forensics, but so many people have not been trained to deal with this emotion and it is SO hard! Pray that God gives them peace... And I know he will.

I love you all!